Debate, Discussion or Stupid Argument?

At what point does a discussion turn into a debate? And at what point does a debate turn into a foolish and stupid argument?


Two springboard passages:


Acts 18:27 and 28 -- When Apollos wanted to go to Achaia, the brothers encouraged him and wrote to the disciples there to welcome him. On arriving, he was a great help to those who by grace had believed. For he vigorously refuted the Jews in public debate, proving from the Scriptures that Jesus was the Christ.


2 Timothy 2: 22 - 26 -- Flee the evil desires of youth, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart. 23 Don't have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels. 24 And the Lord's servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful. 25 Those who oppose him he must gently instruct, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth, 26 and that they will come to their senses and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will.

An errant brother (who happens to be a minister) with whom I have been hoping to study has lately refused me, giving as his reasons his very busy schedule and his desire to not become embroiled in debate. This last has been his reason in previous encounters for shutting me down, not letting me open the Bible to see what God's Word says about the issue up for discussion. When I persisted in opening the Bible or referring to the Scriptures, I was called "argumentative" and "divisive." So it's obvious he doesn't want to study with me.

That's fine, his choice, he has every right to refuse, etc. But it's got me thinking about where the lines are drawn between discussion, debate, and stupid argument. Can you debate gently, or must it, by definition, always be "vigorous refutation" as in Acts 18? Luke calls Apollos "a great help" because he debated.

So let's reason together. I'm sure that as time passes, those who choose to contribute here will come into disagreement with each other. I'm not afraid of that. Disagreements are welcome here, in fact. You may post anonymously or not, but let's remember Paul's direction to Timothy, and do our best not to be foolish or stupid with each other.